Relationships and Life

In life you will always meet people who bring you happiness, sadness, provoke your thinking or your feelings, who guide you, or take away from you, who share their secrets or steal yours, who are there for you whenever you need them or who are not there for you at all.

For me, every relationship I have had has taught me something.  Some of these relationships have had a profound effect on me as a person and have ultimately changed my way of thinking and have also changed me as a whole. People come and go, but their essence always lingers.

I believe that there are people who come into your life at a time when you either need them or don't. Every one of those times is a lesson and an experience.  Every change brings you something new and you have to roll with the punches. There can be extreme high's and lows but as they say what doesn't kill you will make you stronger.  Having children has taught me patience for some things and not for others.

As a friend I haven't always been perfect and I don't think I am an expert on this topic either. But I wanted to share a few things that I have gone thru in my life that have made me the person I am today. 

My relationship with my parent's was relatively good.  I wasn't a problem child and a reasonably good student.  But I was also fiercely independent from a young age and hated anyone doing anything for me. I think my parents realized this and although they were quite strict when I was young they also gave me the freedom to make my own decisions and be my own person.  Which I am very grateful for.  Especially my father who always said to me that I should make my own choices, my own mistakes,  learn to trust my instincts and to always rely on myself.  He also reminded me that when the going gets tough you can't always wait for someone else to change that situation for you.

To this very day I have trouble asking for help even when I need it.  I'm still working on it.

In my 20's I was fortunate to meet a lot of interesting and varied people. I had moved out of home and gone to live in another part of the country and everything was exciting!! I was young and relatively inexperienced about what was out there, but I wasn't afraid to be on my own and I wanted to see it all.

 Going out in a new big city was fun.....I had the pleasure of spending time with all sorts of wonderful people.....it was a great time...I remember thinking how much I loved the diversity in everyone. Whether rich or poor everyone bought something to the table. I loved that they were all talented and their energy was contagious....There was a lot of laughter and we were all so care free..when we had nothing we had each other, someone always had a guitar, or a drink or cigarettes to share....to this day I am still friends with most of these people...but we also had our fair share of problems.  I learnt that no matter how much money or status you have it doesn't always end up with a happy ending. What's important is how you deal with your issues and the best way is to sometimes not try to control everything.  There are some things that you can't hold onto no matter how hard you try...I have learnt to let go slowly.  Let go of friendships that no longer work, let go of pain and hurt and I'm still learning to not try to save everyone.  Sometimes you have to let nature take its course. I wasn't experienced enough to know these things back then and how to deal with something that was bigger then me,  but I did try and fail a few times.  I picked myself up again and started over. I now don't make the same mistakes twice. I try to learn from my friends, especially those who inspire me and who are not with us anymore.  You never stop learning and your never going to know everything even if you think you do.

With every year that passes and every time you have a change in your life whether that be a birth, a death, a marriage, divorce, a new job, a move to a new state or country, wealth or financial stress you will have your friendships tested, pushed, or dissolved. You will meet new people too.  Some will change with you, others no longer have anything in common with you, others will come in passing and some you wonder where they came from at all and why are they here.   Others still simply can't be around you because you have something they want or don't want or the path you have taken is not for them. Its all a part of this never ending quest for us to learn, grow and develop.

Recently I read a sentence that went something like this:  If the ending is bad then start a new beginning. I think this can be applied to most of us.  We should see change as a good thing, face our fears and if we need to move on then let's go.  There might be someone joining you for the ride or you can do it yourself.  It's not scary, just hold your breath, go 1, 2, 3 and before you know it you have made a change for the better.
 
Be realistic, communicate to your loved one's and friends, seek help if you really need it, ask for forgiveness and forgive.  Try not to hold grudges and if simply a relationship is not working sit down and think about it and be honest.  Nothing worse then a relationship turning into a habit and a bad one at that. Its a waste of time and emotion.  Really we only have one life so let's make the most of it.

So for now enjoy what you have, hold onto what's dear to you, clean the clutter from your mind and  your life and go out there open your eyes and see how great things can be.  It may be bumpy along the way but you will get there.

Today I will leave you with this:

The only security is not owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even.  Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what it was, nor forward to what it might be, but living in the present and accepting as it is now.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what it was, nor forward to what it might be, but living in the present and accepting it as it is now.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/a/annemorrow140814.html#M8lIrA7EvhoH8BLS.99

The only real security is not in owning or possessing, not in demanding or expecting, not in hoping, even. Security in a relationship lies neither in looking back to what it was, nor forward to what it might be, but living in the present and accepting it as it is now.

Anne Morrow Lindbergh

Read more at http://www.brainyquote.com/quotes/quotes/a/annemorrow140814.html#M8lIrA7EvhoH8BLS.99

Bye for now, stay happy....:)

A

Addictions

When I say addictions I'm not talking about substance abuse.....I'm talking about Crockery abuse. Yes I'm a Crockaholic..hehe.   I have a serious problem and I am here to confess.  Some people love their label clothing, others shoes (which I love too), some their snow globe collection but I have a very unhealthy obsession with buying crockery, tea pots, cups, glasses, plates and Royal
Doulton crystal.

There isn't a time I don't go to a shopping centre/mall and not walk into a Homeware store of some kind.  I go in just to have a look and walk out with things I probably didn't need but had to have. It doesn't help that everything is displayed nicely in colour co ordination in the windows and with a sign that most likely says 20% to 50% off. That's just temptation right there.

Recently I updated to a new dinner set, coffee cups, tea cups and pot.  The dinner set I can justify as my old set had a few missing and other parts had chipped and cracked, the coffee cups I needed because again I had a few missing from the set and I hate it when I don't have an even set. Now the tea cups and pot I probably didn't need but I thought, I love drinking my tea and it wouldn't hurt to have a few reserves just in case my other one's break.  Do you see my problem here?  I always have an excuse hehe.  Somehow things just taste better when you eat or drink out of nice crockery and glasses. When Prince William married Katherine I had a tea party complete with my finest tea set, scones and jam.  I wanted to get into the spirit of it.  Some of my friends think this is great, others think I'm just weird.

But that's just me.  I used to have an obsession with shoes and handbags but this was before I became a mother with two kids.  These days I don't go out as much and I'm mostly wearing sneakers and low healed shoes.  My carry bag is the baby bag, there is no need for an extra one. So my shoe collection gathers dust and my bags are packed in storage for another time. For now I have to learn to curb my crockery addiction.  Which is hard because I've just decided I need some more plates to add to my set and I just have to have it.  OCD?  maybe.

As I write this I'm drinking a chai latte out of my favourite mug which I recently bought and I'm the only person who is allowed to drink out of it. Do you have an obsession as bad as me?  Please share I know I can't be the only one.

Here are just a few of my favourite things:  

 Passion creates, addiction consumes.”
― Gabor Maté, In the Realm of Hungry Ghosts: Close Encounters with Addiction

Food

Blog below recipe:

 Lamb

10 large lamb cutlets on the bone, french trimmed.
(Get your butcher to do this for you)
 2 tablespoons of garam marsala
Olive Oil
5 Spring onions
1 Fresh red chilli
1 thumb sized piece of ginger
4 jarred red peppers (I didn't add these but you can)
I heaped tablespoon of runny honey
balsamic vinegar
3 sprigs of fresh coriander
1/2 a lemon
Salt and Pepper

Curry Sauce

2 tablespoons of Patak's Korma Paste 
1 x 400gm tin of light coconut milk
1 lemon


Garnishes

3 uncooked poppadoms
fat free natural yoghurt 



Pumpkin Cous cous

One cup of cous cous
(You can buy this at your local supermarket in the pasta and rice aisle)
I cup of chicken stock
Oil
Half a butternut pumpkin cut into cubes ( steamed, boiled or roasted )
Make sure the pumpkin is not overcooked and is still slightly firm
I small red onion diced
1 garlic clove diced
6 small mushrooms sliced into quarters
1 teaspoon of cumin
1 teaspoon of tumeric
1 teaspoon of parsley
1 teaspoon of coriander dried or fresh
Salt and pepper

Method: 

Rub lamb with salt and pepper and the garam marsala, bash and flatten them with you fist or a mallet and put them in a hot frying pan with 1 or two tablespoons of oil turning when they have gone nice and brown. Cook for 2 or 3 minutes on each side.  Meanwhile heat the chicken stock until boiling or use a chicken stock cube and add to water. Add the cous cous stir slightly and put lid on...leave for 2 minutes to set. Put the Korma paste and coconut milk into another frying pan with the juice of a  quarter or half a lemon, bring to the boil and simmer for 5 minutes on a low heat. Chop up the Coriander, Spring onion, chilli and peppers into small pieces.

In the same pan as you cooked the lamb.  Stir in the diced onion and cook for one minute and then add the mushrooms and cook for another minute.  Add the pumpkin and garlic cook for another minute. Check cous cous and go thru with a fork add a teaspoon of oil.  Stir the cous cous in the pan with all your other vegetables add the cumin and tumeric and a bit of pepper.  Add salt to your liking.  Mix thru and turn heat off.

Break up the poppadoms into small pieces put into the microwave and cook for a minute or two until they puff up.  Take them out and bash them further with a rolling pin.  At the last minute toss the lamb with honey and a splash of balsamic vinegar.  Serve the lamb on a big serving platter scattered with the spring onions, peppers and chilli on top with the poppadoms on the sides . Pour the Curry sauce in a bowl and Cous Cous seperate.  Put yoghurt in a small bowl and your Cous Cous in a seperate bowl...Have some lemon wedges out on the table too.  The idea is to get the lamb with your hands, dip it in the sauce, then roll it in the poppadoms and add a dollap of yoghurt on top and add lemon to your liking.  Eat with the cous cous for a complete meal....Yum!

Enjoy!!



 FOOD!!!



We are all busy and rushing around doing our thing whatever that may be.... but for me no matter what,  I love to end my day with a great meal.  I was never a person who enjoyed take away/take out foods...I don't mind it once in a while but I prefer home cooking....I grew up in a house where the word take away or take out only meant that the oven had blown up or it was way too hot for my mother or father to whip up one of their fantastic meals and that was rare. At school my brother and I had sandwiches made for us the European way...in Vienna white bread, Schnitzel in the middle with cheese and Tomato wrapped in foil....it would take you half an hour just to unwrap it:) The other kids thought we were very uncool while they ate their vegemite or jam sandwiches. Numerous times we were laughed at. We were only allowed a lunch order once a week and with that there were strict instructions from my mother who to put it bluntly said "no meat pies as you will die of food poisoning".  Which now as an adult I absolutely love meat pies and I'm not dead yet...haha.    Dinner for us was a South Eastern European specialty and there was always plenty, finished off by a tray of assorted cakes made fresh by my mother.  I don't think as children we really appreciated what we were eating and where our food came from or how it was made. For us it was normal...the only time I realized we were different was when people not from a European culture would come over and gloat over the food and eat like they had never eaten in their lives and tell us how lucky we were to have this.  They were right! We were lucky especially to have both parents who knew how to cook fabulous meals. These days the food we ate back then is described as "Gourmet".  Who's laughing now!!?

As a grown woman in these times I really do appreciate food. I also appreciate my parents culinary skills as it has been passed onto both my brother and myself.  I love to cook, buy cook books, watch cooking shows and make up recipes. I love dinner with friends and recipe swapping. These days you can type in your main ingredient on the internet and usually hundreds of recipes will come up.  I love to experiment with my cooking and usually I will take a recipe and tweak it slightly and out comes a masterpiece.  I know this because my fiance Z just bulldozes his way through dinner and its all gone in a matter of seconds.  He loves food and eating it and lucky for him he has it on the table every night. I try to mix it up and we eat Seafood at least 3 times a week which is our favourite.  As for cakes, they are few and far between as firstly I'm time poor and secondly we are trying to keep our weight down....emphasis on the word TRYING!!

Up above I have added a photo and recipe of a recent meal I cooked incorporating Jamie Oliver's Lamb Lollipops in curry sauce (that I slightly tweaked), with my Pumpkin Couscous..I hope you enjoy.  Let me know what you think. Z devoured this in seconds and asked me to make it again...hehe...Who needs take out...?:)

I will sign off with this:     One cannot think well, love well, sleep well, if one has not dined well.”
― Virginia Woolf, A Room of One's Own



Enjoy your weekend people:)

Bye for now...

Ana x

 

My Kids

Do you ever sit there and reflect on your life BK ( Before kids) and AK( After kids )?.....People say they can't remember what their life was like before, but I CAN!....endless parties, late nights, catching up at cafe's, very early mornings  (this was not waking up this was coming home), freedom to shop at the drop of a hat and one bag used to be sufficient to carry your purse, your phone, makeup and a few bits and pieces.

Now its late nights kept awake by constant feeds from baby Niki and the wake up call every few hours on top....then there's the 3 year old's Aki's nightmare so here comes mummy to comfort. There are the constant clothes to be washed, floors to be mopped, dinners to be cooked, bathtimes, bedtimes, play times, vaccination appointments, bags to be carried and no you can't go to the shop just on a whim.  Pack a suitcase, pack a bag, don't forget the pram, buckle in those kids and make sure you have combed your hair and put your shoes on...I once went out in my slippers!!

My son Aki has an obsession with Washing machines and dryers...Don't worry about buying him toys or taking him to a Play Centre...take him to a white goods store or laundromat and watch his face light up..he can spend hours just watching the machines go round and round and front loaders are his favourite.....We have had to lock our laundry door as we have found our son washing not only dirty clothes but clean one's too and he throws in a few toys for good measure. I am hoping that something comes of this as its driving me crazy....another thing he loves is constantly torturing his pet fish....that poor amphibian has had apple juice, milk, mints and insect repellent all poured into his tank and survived.....as one of my friends has said at least your fish will smell nice, have strong bones and fresh breath.....I'm going to start calling him Super Fishy and no I'm not getting a dog!!

My daughter Niki on the other hand is very placid and very different from her brother in more ways then one.  She is a chilled baby with a smile for everyone.  I am hoping this continues as I'm enjoying motherhood a little bit more the second time around.

But for all the trials, sleepless nights, challenges and anxiety I wouldn't have it any other way...My two munchkins are absolutely my world and they will only be this size for a short time before they are no longer interested in mummy's and daddy's cuddles so I'm enjoying every minute and every hour even if sometimes I think Gosh....this isn't how I pictured it all to be....Roses and lollipops and cute kids in trendy outfits...:)))..its more like screaming, messy hair and sticky fingers.

For those of you out there who are in the same boat...motherhood is the hardest job but the most rewarding....and all the cliche's are true!!  You cannot possibly love anything more than your child and I thank God we were lucky enough to be chosen for this experience.

I will sign off with this quote today from one of my favourite authors:   Love children especially, for they too are sinless like the angels; they live to soften and purify our hearts and, as it were, to guide us.”
― Fyodor Dostoyevsky, The Brothers Karamazov

Hello!

As I am new to blogging I will first of all say Hi...as you may have read in my profile I am a mother of two kids a  little boy of 3 and a baby girl of almost 7 months.  I decided to start writing as a way to express the things I find important to me and also to share some things I have found help me in my day to day life. As I am currently navigating my way through here I am hoping you will all understand me not posting often straight away until I get my head around setting up my page.  But I will be endorsing products,  writing recipes, offering tips,and reviewing books and even some restaurants and eateries that I have had the pleasure of visiting. I will also enjoy receiving information from any of you out there as I love to share knowledge and I also love to receive.

I look forward to all of you coming on this blogging journey with me . Motherhood can be a very daunting, tiring but also wonderful and rewarding experience.  Things are not always picture perfect but hopefully we can find simple ways to get through our days.

See you all shortly and I will leave you with this for now:  Life is like riding a bicycle. In order to keep the balance you must keep moving.

Bye for now.